Guilt and Peace
This is my first post on the on line world. I have thought about it for a while. I guess I will post things on what I am thinking about. Always happy for dialogue.
Do You Know Peace?
Peace in your heart and mind is precious beyond belief. If you have it, guard it and keep it! If you don't have it, seek it! Find it! In my travels it is overwhlemingly true that one reason for lack of peace is that you have done something wrong. (There is also feeling guilty for things that are not your fault, but i mean here for things that you have done wrong)
Generally when you have done something wrong you feel bad - depending on how bad, you can feel in the depths of despair. Or you block it out, and ignore it. Either way it will effect you.
In Psalm 32 David says that he kept silent about his sin, and as a result, his bones wasted away, was groaning all day long, he felt god's hand heavy on him, and felt his strength sapped. That's guilt I guess. It can keep you awake at night, it can give you stomach cramps, headaches, it can weigh you down ... such a powerful feeling. All encompassing.
Then David says, "Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity". He confessed to God.
I think that this confession was a long time coming. I know the feeling .... maybe he felt that this sin was too big, this sin was too bad, this one was unforgiveable, or he had done this sin one too many times. After all he was God's King on earth. Maybe it would be forgiveable for other people to sin, but not him. I know that conversation!
Either David had enough of feeling bad or he decided to obey God, ... in any case in the end he confessed. I think that was brave.
And David said ... "Then you forgave the guilt of my sin!"
The burden of hiding in the darkness, of being unknown and alone with yourself has gone. Freedom. Peace.
The experience of confessing to God, is amazing. You are known for what you are and you are loved in that place of vulnerability and brokenness ... When there is such peace, and assurance and freedom promised, what stops me confessing?
"Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the most holy place by the blood of jesus .... let us draw near to God with with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience ... let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess for he who promised is faithful." Romans 10:19-24
When i was praying for a friend on this topic, I wrote this into my prayer journal - not sure whether i wrote it, or i copied it from a book .... it's kind of from God to his child ..
"What is on your heart my child? Is the way forward gone completely? Do you feel you have failed? Do you feel there is no way back to me, your father? These thoughts are so hard to confess, to say out Loud... You are broken - but i came for the sick not for the well and together! You are broken - but my son testifies that I give life and give life back. You are broken, but i donlt require success, but honest dependent children. You are broken - but not beyond my love and not beyond my touch. You are broken - but my spirit is within you, and it says, 'never will i leave you, never will i forsake you.' So Confess to me. And experience my love - I declare you lovely in my sight ..."
posted by me @ 6:05 PM
9 Comments:
so great to have you out here in the blogging community!!! I will create my link to you with great joy!
thanks for joining the dots between confessing sin and receiving God's peace so eloquently. Actually, hope this is ok to say but your post has a very Spurgeon-my-hero quality - like a morning/evening devotion. Love it!! So looking forward to reading more of what ever it is that you're thinking!
love em
Natalia! Hello!!! I agree totally! my experience is that confessing it to another person and to God is sometimes also needed. I don;t know whether if once i have confessed and still feel guilt whether that suggests I have not received God's forgiveness and love, or whether I worry what people think. If i have confessed to God and don;t feel forgiven, I pray that I will experience that forgiveness, and often I will confess it someone else, and have them pray with me about it. I don;t know why, but this often helps me. Maybe at prayer group we should Confession time! Maybe loving each other deeply includes that hmmmm ....
And the ever lovely emma! Thanks for saying hello! Peace is good. Lack of peace is hard!
I am here!!! Rhea is a favourite!
Openly confessing sin is counter intuitive: I think it will bring my heart 'Gravitas' [and so I avoid it], but it actually brings my heart [in Christ] 'Levitas'.
..I also experience the inefficacy of confession to God without confessing to another person. It seems to me that this is something that the protestant church in general has gotten horribly horribly wrong. I lived a lot of my life in a lot of bondage because I thought confession to God was enough, and it was only after I discovered the enormous freeing (what Justin called Levitas) power of confessing (from the latin for "to say (out loud)together"--) to/with another person that I began to experience freedom. Now I have a regular habit of confession-to-another-human-being, and this works enormously well for me, allows me to experience forgiveness/forgive myself.
heloo justin friend! thanks for saying hello!
And hello to Ben .. i like your blog :)
If confession to God is not enough to help us experience forgiveness (that's often my experience anyway), then why does the bible talk more about confession to god than to eachother?
RH
Hey and Ben, thanks for what you said about your church experience. Was it a different church / bible / friends who got you into confession to your bro's and sisters?
*does* the Bible talk more about confession to God than to each other?
The twelve steps is what taught me, both first timishly and now habitually, about confession-to-another-human-being.
...does the bible even allow for the idea of relationship with god separate from/apart from relationship with other people? I think not, and this is a good think, because if it did, it would, imho, it would be way off track. therefore, confession etc.
that is to say, I find this true for me in a much larger realm than confession of sins. I am utterly incapable of connecting with/relating to/chasing/being chased by/experiencing god outside of/apart from/without my doing of all these things in relationship with other people. It is the latter which is primary/more real, and the former, if it exists at all for me (which it occasionally does) is derived from the latter.
hey Ben (benjamin!) ...
I agree with you. ANd i also feel like there is relating to God outside humans, as humanity can never fully represent God. When people let us down, where does that leave us with God. When i am alone, I am alone with my God. I guess the broader qu, is what is it to experience God? R
Post a Comment
<< Home